woensdag 29 februari 2012

Heaven and Hell


While walking down the street one day a Corrupt M.P. (that may be redundant) was tragically hit by a car and died.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," says the M.P.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.."
"Really? I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the M.P.
"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the lift and he goes down, down, down to hell.

The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course.
In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of thepeople.
They played a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and the finest champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes.
They are all having such a good time that before the M.P. realises it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the lift doors close.

The lift goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him, "Now it's time to visit heaven...”

So, 24 hours passed with the M.P. joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."
The M.P. reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the lift and he goes down, down, down to hell...
Now the lift doors open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the rubbish and putting it in black bags as more rubbish falls to the ground.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders.

"I don't understand," stammers the M.P. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of rubbish and my friends look miserable.
What happened?"

The devil smiles at him and says:
"Yesterday we were campaigning, Today, you voted.."

Vote wisely in the next election!

Thanks to my dear friend Janet from Chiqwell for keeping us informed.

Europe SL 29-2-2012

dinsdag 7 februari 2012

Leven in een notendop 13


Mw. T. is 85, rijk en al heel lang weduwe. Ze is al jaren ziek en vreselijk eenzaam en zou eigenlijk opgenomen moeten worden.
De dochters vinden dat ze thuis moet blijven wonen; opname in een verpleeghuis slaat een gat in de erfenis.
Zo komt er 's morgens iemand van de thuiszorg en 's middags en 's avonds en ook 's nachts. Mw. T. is een moeilijke vrouw, verzuurd en slechtgehumeurd.
De dochters komen op visite en houden hun jas aan.
Alles wat je extra doet voor Mw. T. wordt dankbaar aanvaard en toch zuur afgewezen.

Opeens was ze toch opgenomen, bij de nonnen, gratis; omdat ze vroeger veel gedoneerd had. En zo werd het geduld van de dochters beloond.

©Gavi Mensch
Nederland BV, 12-1-12

Levens in een notendop zijn ook gepubliceerd op http://120w.nl